With A Little Help From My Friends
On my beach walk this morning I noticed this tree branch supported by the action of “someone” who decided to give “nature” a little help. The tree branch is extending out to reach the sun bending itself perilously to the breaking point. The “someone” decided to create a support for the branch so it could be successful in its reach to get the sun’s nourishment for the main tree trunk. Even nature sometimes needs a little help. I was prompted to reflect on the value of giving and accepting help versus a perceived need to be independent. I have had to learn that there is a benefit to not only giving help but also to being able to ask for help. My focus on being independent has presented a challenge in this regard.
Research supports this benefit. In this article, giving help and being able to ask for help is an important aspect of healthy self-care. Asking for help can help make people happier. Here’s why, Sep 21, 2022 “People want to make a difference in other people’s lives and they feel good when they’re able to help others, says social phycologist Xuan Zhao the author. “Asking for help is also important – it enables kindness and unlocks opportunities for positive social connection”, Zhao says.”
Does the separation of physical connection, that is so common in society these days, tend to encourage or restrict positive social connection? In this day and age, physical separation is a fact of life due to possible contagion in events like the pandemic, and the appearances of other viruses. It now becomes necessary to reach out, virtually, for social connections. Asking for help is now a skill to be learned even on the internet.
“if we perceive that asking for help will mean someone will view us as needy, or not well equipped to do a task, or incompetent, we might hesitate”, says this article reviewed by Gary Drevitch, June 14, 2021 Harness the Power of Asking for Help. How to ask for help at any age.
Do you offer to help without being asked? Do you feel comfortable asking for help for yourself?
If you would like to share your thoughts, please comment.
Want to have a private conversation? Please click on the Talk With Me button below.
Another interesting article. I have walked by and seen the “help” for this tree and thought what a good idea to keep the long branch from falling down on the many beach goers who come and enjoy the shade of the trees. Help of a different kind. I never thought about the help of the tree to grow and reach for the sun.
We can all use a little help now and again. I am usually one who is quick to offer help to someone in need but not so quick to ask for myself. Thank you for the insight into the benefit my ask may have toward someone else’s happiness.
Melinda, Thank you for your comment and support for connection. It is always a 2 way benefit.
I’ve been very aware of how disconnected we can become in a world that seems to be more and more online and less “real”. I’ve been reading The Second Mountain by David Brooks and he very much sees the second half of life as being a time of reaching out to others and investing ourselves in relationships and being there for other people – it’s an interesting concept to think about (and so important in this post-covid era).
Hello Leanne – I agree with you regarding the disconnection among people and it’s disheartening to me. People tend to forget that in order to be healthy we have to connect with others and learn to share. We are inter-dependent beings. Thank you for your comment.
Leanne, Thank you for your reply and your support for connection. Giving and asking for help is such an important part of connection.
I love to give a helping hand whenever I can without being asked. The other day I helped someone in a wheelchair who had a problem putting on his seatbelt as it was stuck. On a separate occasion I bought a coffee for an older gentleman who I often see at a local café. I stop and inquire about people’s health or I just offer a smile and a ‘Hi’. It costs nothing and makes two people feel good: the recipient and me. I feel comfortable asking for help but feel more comfortable offering help. This society is too individualistic and it comes with a cost.
I was always willing to give help but seldom asked for help myself. I met a wonderful elderly lady in my days in Virginia that taught me a lesson I never forgot. The joy I get when I help someone is the joy I rob someone from giving me help.
That goes hand in hand with giving amd recieving. I was always a giver but did not like when others gave me things.
I know the joy in both…so I learned a valuable life lesson I have passed on many times.
Good to see people helping nature. Be it a tree, stray dog, a hurt bird, etc.
We were made to care and to love.
Thank you for a beautiful observation and thought.
Deybi, Thank you for sharing your beautiful story.